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[Chorus]
I gotta buncha shit on my ass
How did I get all of this shit on my ass?
Shit on my ass
How did I get all of this shit on my ass?

[Verse 1]
I saw you under a willow tree
You were reading a book about slavery
I sat down in the grass
And asked you, "Can you see if I have some shit on my ass?"

[Chorus]
Shit on my ass
How did I get all of this shit on my ass?
Shit on my ass
How did I get all of this shit on my ass?

[Verse 2]
My lover left me
In the middle of the century
She said she only wanted to be platonic
And I asked, "Is it 'cause my ass has some shit on it?"

[Chorus]
Shit on my ass
How did I get all of this shit on my ass?
Shit on my ass, whoa
How did I get all of this shit on my ass?

[Verse 3]
I went to the grocery
To buy some chocolate-covered strawberries
They threw me out the exit
Because my ass was covered in shit

[Chorus]
Shit on my ass, whoa
How did I get all of this shit on my ass?
Shit on my ass

[Outro]
I got a buncha shit on my ass
Feces on my rear end, feces on my butt
I can't handle it, it's so much
I got shit on my ass

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